17 Little Things You Do That Can Ruin a Good Relationship

Good romantic relationships are hard to come by. Once you’re in a relationship that you think will last, do whatever you can to preserve it. You can do this by avoiding the 17 relationship-ruiners listed in this article.

Not Opening Up

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Good relationships are built on trust and being vulnerable with one another. If you refuse to speak about your problems, your partner might feel like you’re hiding something. They might stop trusting you with their secrets if you don’t show that you trust them with yours.

Being Selfish

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“People who exhibit selfishness tend to have a pattern of acting in their own self-interests with no regard for who they may hurt along the way. It can be exhausting and painful to have a relationship with a selfish person who doesn’t seem to care about you or your needs,” says Psych Central.

Not Spending Time Together

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A relationship can only thrive if two people spend enough time with one another. If you don’t take enough time out of your schedule to spend with your partner, you’ll grow apart and might end up separating. Schedule some alone time with your partner each week.

Not Listening

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Everyone likes to be listened to. So when you cut your partner off while they’re still talking or ignore them while they speak, they feel annoyed. If your partner feels like you’re not listening to them, they might begin to look for someone outside the relationship who will. 


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Flirting is very destructive for a relationship and isn’t something committed partners should do. Choosing Therapy agrees, stating that “there is a risk that flirting can become something bigger and more destructive, leading some to stray and commit emotional or physical infidelity. It can destroy your relationship.”

Not Conversing

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For the bond between a couple to grow stronger, they must spend enough time talking to one another. This is more than just chit-chat or small talk, but real, in-depth conversations. You and your partner need to make time for these deep conversations and have them regularly.

Not Pulling Your Weight

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No one wants to feel like a servant in a relationship. For your relationship to be a success, you must help your partner out around the house when you can. Appreciate the work they do around the house and thank them for it. Share household chores.

Insulting Your In-Laws

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You and your in-laws might not always see eye-to-eye but your partner will really appreciate it if you try your best to get along with them. When you insult your in-laws you upset your partner. They might get so upset that they choose their parents over you.


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Shouting isn’t good communication. BetterHelp says, “In general, yelling and screaming are not considered healthy behaviors in relationships. Although people may raise their voices from time to time when they are angry or frustrated, yelling and screaming in relationships can be unhealthy for both you and your loved ones.”

Lacking Trust

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Your partner needs to know that you trust them. If you’re constantly asking them where they are and demanding to know who they’re talking to, they will soon get fed up with you. Just like you do, your partner needs space. You must trust that they’ll be faithful to you. 


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Lying to your partner will make them immediately suspicious of you and will break the trust that you had between you. If you lie habitually, your partner will find it hard to believe anything you say or what you do. It won’t be long before they tire of you.

Being Jealous

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A measure of jealousy in a relationship is good, but being overly jealous isn’t healthy. Your partner should be able to interact with others without being worried about what you will think or stressing that you might get angry. This isn’t good for either of you.

Being Pushy

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No one wants to be in a relationship with a bully. So if you come on too strong and are always forcing your partner to do things they don’t want to do, they’ll get tired of you. Relationships are not dictatorships. Always treat your partner with love.

Being Lazy

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We all have days when we’re too tired to do anything. But if you regularly show a lack of interest in going out with your partner or doing anything other than lying on the couch, they will get bored of you. You need to enjoy one another’s company.

Being Violent

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According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, “Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviors to maintain power & control in an intimate relationship.” Just one instance of violence towards your partner might make them reconsider the relationship and leave you. You must control your actions, and only approach your partner with love.

Being Insensitive

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If you’re insensitive to your partner’s feelings, you’ll come across as a cold person who is self-interested. A person who isn’t receiving the love and attention they need in a relationship might begin to look elsewhere. Try to be sensitive to the needs of your partner. 

Demanding Your Way

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Being demanding is never good for a relationship. Good relationships require give and take. What does that mean? It means that sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose. You should never demand that you have your own way or frighten your partner into doing things the way you want them to.

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